November 17, 2003

Dear Drummers,

For those of you who have been in the drum groups for a year now, this month’s drum will be familiar. In the first hour, as usual, we’ll strike up the hot rhythms, the cool rhythms and hopefully the theta rhythms that open your consciousness and imagination.

In “Hour 2” we will invite the Cailleach into the room. She is the mythical Scottish figure—the hag—who comes at this time of year to cast winter’s cold across the land. Cailleach is Gaelic for “Old One” or “The Veiled One.” In central Europe, a similar figure is sometimes called “the Old Bone Mother”—the one who comes to collect the dead and transport them to the next world to begin their regeneration into a next life. In Scandinavia, she may be connected with one of the three goddesses of fate (The Norns). A more general way to conceive of this figure is as one of the “mothers” or an aspect of the great mother. Or as the pruning aspect of the Holy Spirit.

If you have read anything about the Cailleach, you will probably have read that she is a bitter, vengeful, nasty tempered blue-faced old hag. This is one of her faces certainly—the cold wind that cuts into your cheeks with a kind of nasty glee. But I don’t experience her as nasty. I experience her as “doing her job.” Just as the sun does its job of calling the corn up from the soil, and calling the sweetness into the fruit, the Cailleach does her job of culling that which must go from this world—culling that whose time has come. Maybe I like the moniker “Old Bone Mother” because she seems a little more kindly—less the blue-faced hag, and more the blue-collar worker.

The underlying image here is of attachment. This is a primary word across spiritual traditions. All theologies assert that a true seeker must look closely at the things s/he is attached to, and be ready to let go of some, often treasured ones, or many—and ultimately, all.

I’ve long been interested in the “Gnostic Gospels”—those writings created around the time of Jesus that were excluded from the official scriptures because of their theology. One of the themes in some of these writings is the idea that seekers who advance in insight and wisdom do not necessarily become happier people. This is in such stark opposition to the image of the grinning “saved” person who has no further worries since being born again. Autumn reminds me that the more seriously you take your spiritual studies and disciplines, the rounder you become, the healthier, the more tolerant, the more patient you become, the fuller you become, the more fragrant you become, the juicier, the sweeter, the more delicious you become. But happier? A Buddhist monk in Thailand told me once “Happiness is overrated.” Well, there you have it.

I have always loved this time of year, partly because I was born in the autumn. I love autumn because I love the descent into the dark of year, because it is the time of year most associated with death, grief, inner-journeys and spiritual experiences that are deep, but not necessarily pleasant. I like the falling leaves because I have come to see them not only a symbol of the cycle of life and death, but as a lesson: we too must let go of things—regularly. Pruning and culling are important in the inscape as well as out here in the world we see and touch.

Every culture has an underworld, dark, hag goddess, whose primary function is to facilitate transformation from one state of being to the next. The Cailleach comes to take things away—things that we may not want to lose. Another way to put it: she comes to take that which no longer belongs. Or: she comes to take that which cannot be sustained. Or: she comes to take that which prohibits the life force. Autumn is typically her time of year.
The focus of “Hour 2” then will be for each participant to come into the presence of the Cailleach/Old Bone Mother. We will set an atmosphere whereby that presence may be invited in to collect the things that must be taken away.

Like everything I do, this may appeal to you in some ways and not others. Some of you may enjoy the theatricality. Some may enjoy the psychological or poetic aspects. Some may enjoy the spiritual aspects. I hope you will feel free to choose your comfort level from the options below. I never want to force an experience on anyone, but I want to offer those who seek it a chance to go deeply into an experience that combines the drum with prayer and visioning.

Options:
1) Participate as a drummer only—supporting the experience of others (a very important job).
2) Ask yourself “what do I need/want to have taken from me?” Your participation will be an act of transformation that you want to activate—a little like making a new year’s resolution, but in a more imaginal and ritual environment.
3) Don’t decide for yourself what you want or need to be taken, but leave it up to the Cailleach.

I’ll explain on Friday how you would go about doing each of these. I encourage you to pick the option that feels right, and to spend a little time thinking about it between now and then.

See you on Friday!
Jaime